If you want to ruin your life and sink a couple thousand hours into something, Warframe is free, has a decent backstory and a few bangers on the soundtrack.

The regular gameplay loop boils down to “Be a ninja with space magic, build weapons and biomechanical suits of armour out of blueprints that RNG drop from different enemies to customise powers/damage types, level up weapons to rank up so you can get bigger and better weapons, save the solar system with the power of friendship and this gun I found.”

Of course they’re based in Delaware.

https://ihl-databases.icrc.org/en/ihl-treaties/gciv-1949/article-18

Gotta be Tepoz, all that mercury would have ruined the pulque

Check his hard drives

And here I thought we were going to have to fight those boston dynamics robot dogs for water, but no, just the fascist’s genetically engineered rapedogs

Keys are being jangled that have never been jingled before