Tomorrow’s headline, “Millenials are single handedly killing the breakfast industry”.
Pro-tip: You can save money on living expenses if you just live in a cardboard box by the roadside and die.
Please not by the roadside, noone wants to see your progress to absolute freedom.
That’s illegal in many places. Illegal to be on a roadside, illegal to kill yourself.
The Wall Street Journal is just shitposting for rich people.
They act like most of us even have time to make breakfast like we’re living in some 90’s sitcom
It’s people like you that make me look like an asshole. Every morning I wake up at 3am to squeeze orange juice, make sausage gravy, biscuits, waffles, 5 omelettes, 40 pancakes, 6lbs of bacon, hash browns, buttered toast, and right after my son comes down the stairs, puts his ball cap on, grabs a single piece of bacon, heads out the door in a rush, I chase him down with a PB&J he inevitably always forgets. But it’s not like I want to waste 40lbe of food per day. Some days I just want my son to sit down and eat the 40lbs of food I prepared. He may think I’m overbearing but I’m really overcaring.
What intro was that from? I can’t figure it out :-(
It’s from… “Nondescript White-Ethnocentric Nostalgia Family with Canned Laughter” Good show
“We know life is Hard, but have you tried Ultra Hard by skipping the most important meal of the day and starting out famished?”
Off topic but I don’t think breakfast is any more or less important than a meal any other time of the day. Most days I only eat one big meal around dinnertime and maybe have a few bites of some snack throughout the day. I’ve been like that for years now it started from doing 12 hour construction shifts where I’d just work all day with a coffee and maybe an apple or something then eat a big meal once I was home. I don’t do construction anymore but the way I eat stuck with me. It’s probably worth pointing out that I’m very fit and a healthy bodyweight (5’10 152lbs) and I don’t suffer any negative effects from living like this. I’d say I’m healthier than 90% of the people I know.
deleted by creator
Science says nothing of the sort, but marketing certainly does.
Actually, science says he’s right. You should fast at least 16 hour per day.
I’ve never seen this were have you read that ?
For exemple
16/8 is the most common intermittent fasting protocol for begginers. 20/4 is recommended in case of autoimmune disease, to reverse leaky gut and insulin resistance.
Advertising says he’s wrong. Science actually backs him. Look up autophagy and see all the health benefits that you get from a fasted state.
the most important meal of the day bullshit was invented by america, fuckin milk lobby and shit somene else explain it I don’t care enough to
“And while you’re at it, do you really NEED to sleep?”
"In fact, do you even NEED a home? You can just sleep at work like a good little corporate slave! "
might be funny until you know there are actually some people who do this.
There’s a webcomic about a world where almost no one sleeps anymore thanks to a new drug. And they work 16 hours a day.
16 hours a day in a world where no one has to sleep seems wildly optimistic
I hope whoever wrote this trips in their bathroom and gets a severe brain injury.
Man that’s kinda fucked up, who knows if they’d survive getting another brain injury
Can’t get a brain injury if I have no brain…
taps head
I think something like “taps elbow” would be funnier.
Same but for the editor who chose that headline
News sites will do anything to get engagement and attention. ANYTHING.
AIs don’t have a bathroom, or even a brain.
the person who greenlit this article for publishing does
Editor: “I could spend the next 10 minutes reading this article before publishing, or go to lunch early.”
I see they moved on from telling us not to have avocado to toast to just not have any toast.
One more step and they’ll move onto what they actually want us to do.
No need to skip meals, there’s plenty of rich to eat
Your life is hard? Add malnourishment and see if that helps.
I already skip breakfast, gonna need additional money saving tips…
No worries, I’ve got you. Skip lunch to save additional money.
already did. now what
You may not believe it but you can skip dinner too
Sleep for dinner again? But I had that last night!
You intermittent fast for health benefits.
I intermittent fast because I’m broke
We are not the same
In fact, after breakfast and lunch, dinner is the best meal to skip.
How much additional do I save if was planning on having avocado toast?
You’d save abo… Wait a minute, us regular people can’t afford avocado toast.
stick to low GI carbs perhaps, so it takes extra time to digest!
also, drink water right before a meal. turns out brain is pretty shit at distinguishing thirst and hunger… you also get “full” by drinking water so you end up eating a bit less heh.
My prescriptions cost so much too. Maybe I should just stop taking my antidepressants and see how it rides out. .
“If you spiral into the grave, your cost of living goes down by 100%!” - some jackass at the wsj soon, probably
The headline is as valid as “just stop being poor”
It’s fun and games, but lately I’ve seen 2 colleagues eating from the office kitchen the leftovers of extra bread and cream cheese, instead of ordering. It’s actually sad.
Damn, I wish my break room had bread and cream cheese 😋
you guys have break rooms in your offices?
You guys go into the office?
We need a Marx-as-Clippy emoji for “it seems that it may be time to improve society somewhat. Would you like help with that?”
Ooh, perhaps also a George-as-Clippy emoji?
Marx-as-Clippy recommends fixing spelling mistakes by deleting the document and starting over
