• volvoxvsmarla @lemm.ee
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    10 months ago

    The funny thing is, I knew all that. And I kept getting the same results from my excessive google searches. So why did I keep googling? I still wonder what the point was. But probably there just wasn’t a point. I had all the symptoms and I knew that and I still wanted to keep my show up, which, insanely, worked. I did go on medical leave at some point but everyone thinks it was because of burnout and depression. Even the doctors. They saw my blood work and still somehow attributed insane ferritin levels to a flu I claimed I had. No need to say that keeping my appearance could have cost me my life and I absolutely do not recommend detoxing on your own.

    And it did get better, thanks. Took a while and some fallbacks (this was probably the worst and most excessive and destructive binge since pre 2016). Haven’t had a drink in over 3 years and at that point it was already just a glass of wine due to holidays.

      • volvoxvsmarla @lemm.ee
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        10 months ago

        Oh God I don’t remember. The thing is that I didn’t have “The Drink”. I drank basically everything (I know most people say that they drank mostly wine or mostly whiskey etc). And I didn’t really keep count. I’d say on average days I had a beer or two before going to work, one at lunch, about 100 ml of hard liquor during the day and one or two beers before going home. At home I’d just keep drinking, wine and whiskey and beer and champagne and vodka and gin… Average bad days I’d guess about a liter of hard booze within 1.5 days and accompanied by one or two bottles of wine and a some 2-3 liters of beer.

        For reference, I am a woman weighing about 50 kg. Most of the time I was extraordinarily high functioning. Like, best grade in an elite university in an exam despite being blasted.